Better off dead or quitter?

After a year I left this Blog, here I am again.
After 8 months Daddy passed away, here I am again.
After 5 months of the betrayal, here I am again.

And after 2 years, here I am again.
2 years.
I thought we could change, to be better_together
but yes, something does change_ you said you'll love me forever
2 years. I'm still waiting for you to turn back, even I'd never cross your mind.
someone better appeared.

I told myself that if I keep on waiting and be patient, everything is going to be right.
I promised myself_with you
but my faith is dying and each and everyday, I'm praying, not to own you but to have the best for you. And I sill couldn't convince myself that its over.

They say a few drinks will help you to forget her but after one too many I know that I'm never
only they can see where this is going to end
but they all think I'm crazy but to me it's perfect sense

and my mates are all there trying to calm me down because I'm shouting your name all over town
I'm swearing if I go there now
I can change your mind turn it all around.

I don't want her to feel guilt but she said nothing
Oh I wanted words but all I heard was nothing.

Nothing.